Seven Key Relationships #2:
Your Relationship With Yourself:
Why Your Words Matter More Than You Think
If there’s one relationship that influences every other part of your life, it’s this one — the relationship you have with yourself.
And yet… it’s the relationship most women put at the very bottom of the list.
We care deeply.
We show up for everyone else.
We give grace to our families, our teams, our communities…
But when it comes to the way we speak to ourselves?
We’re often harsh, rushed, dismissive, or critical without even realizing it.
Here’s the truth, my friend:
How you treat yourself sets the tone for your entire life.
Not just your confidence — but your energy, your relationships, your leadership, your health, and even the way others respond to you.
🌼 The Words You Speak to Yourself Carry Energy
Every thought you think creates an emotional vibration in your body.
This isn’t just mindset — it’s neuroscience, and it’s energy.
A gentle thought brings calm.
A harsh thought brings tension.
A hopeful thought brings courage.
A self-critical thought brings shame or smallness.
Those internal words don’t just stay inside you.
They shape your facial expressions… your posture… your tone of voice…
And ultimately, the way you interact with the people around you.
When you speak kindness to yourself, you naturally speak kindness to others.
When you treat yourself with compassion, you become more compassionate in your relationships.
When you hold judgment toward yourself, that judgment leaks outward.
Your energy is always teaching the people around you how to treat you — and how you treat them.
🌾 Why This Relationship Is Critical
Dr. Jenkins teaches that your relationship with yourself is the second-most foundational relationship in your life.
Right after your Creator.
Why?
Because if you don’t value yourself…
you won’t set boundaries.
you won’t rest.
you won’t honor your needs.
you won’t pursue your calling.
And you won’t believe you’re worthy of support, connection, or change.
Self-respect isn’t optional.
It’s oxygen.
It keeps you grounded when life gets hard.
It keeps you steady when people are demanding.
It keeps you centered when stress wants to take over.
And — perhaps most importantly —
it determines the quality of every other relationship in your life.
🌸 How You Treat Yourself Teaches Others How to Treat You
If you constantly put yourself last…
others will learn to do the same.
If your internal voice is critical…
others may unconsciously mirror that tone.
If you rush yourself, dismiss your emotions, or suppress your needs…
other people won’t recognize that you have needs.
On the other hand:
When you speak to yourself with warmth,
you lift the energy of your home.
When you slow down long enough to breathe and feel,
you give others permission to do the same.
When you honor your limits,
people around you naturally respond with more respect.
Your inner dialogue becomes your outer experience.
Every time.
🌿 The Most Powerful Question You Can Ask Yourself
“If someone I loved were feeling what I’m feeling… what would I say to them?”
Whatever answer rises in your heart —
THAT is the tone of voice you deserve from yourself.
That tone is healing.
That tone is growth.
That tone is resilience.
🌱 A Personal Reflection
My friend, I’ve walked through seasons where my internal voice was far too harsh.
I pushed through pain, exhaustion, expectations, deadlines, caregiving, ranch life, parenting, and leadership roles without stopping to acknowledge my own humanity.
But once I softened that inner dialogue —
once I began treating myself with the tenderness I offered everyone else —
everything shifted.
My energy improved.
My patience expanded.
My boundaries strengthened.
My joy returned.
And my relationships grew deeper and healthier.
Your relationship with yourself is not a luxury.
It’s the foundation that supports your entire life.
🌸 Reflection Questions
(Use these with your 7 Relationships Reflection Journal.)
What tone does my inner voice use most often?
Would I speak to someone I love the way I speak to myself?
What do I need emotionally, spiritually, or physically right now?
Where do I judge myself harshly — and why?
How would my life feel if I offered myself more compassion?
🌿 Closing Thought
My friend, you deserve a gentle life — not because everything is perfect, but because you are worth treating with kindness.
Your words hold power.
Your thoughts carry energy.
And how you treat yourself becomes the foundation for every other relationship you build.
Choose kindness.
Choose compassion.
Choose to be a friend to yourself.
Because when you thrive on the inside, everything in your life begins to flourish.
DOWNLOAD your 7 KEY RELATIONSHIPS Journal HERE
🌿 Inspired by Dr. Paul Jenkins, PsychologistHow to Experience Joy in Your Seven Key Relationships
This series draws inspiration from the work of Dr. Paul Jenkins, Positive Psychologist and author of Pathological Positivity. His teachings on the seven foundational relationships—and his mission through Live On Purpose Central—invite us to see life differently, choose joy intentionally, and nurture the connections that shape our fulfillment.